Jekyll and Hyde
by Blue6 - Blood66
Summary: Rukawa's POV.[chap.4 up - A vehement soul] Rukawa is not the person who we think he is. He never cares about a person's feelings, and resulted to a tragedy. But he sure wanted to give Sakuragi a piece of his mind. final pairing:RuHana. R/R pls.
1. The Mask

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Author's note: Rukawa's POV. This story is purely fiction, and if related to your life/experiences, it is highly coincidental. Reviews/criticisms/flames are entirely welcome! 

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Rukawa's POV

Italicized paragraphs = flashback.

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Jekyll and Hyde

Chapter 1: The Mask

  
  
"Rukawa-kun." a distant call. I turned to see Ayako touching my shoulder, her eyes worried and so deep that her stare might swallow me in. I averted my eyes from her and stared aimlessly at the person sitting in front of me - Kogure. He returned an uneasy nod at me, his eyes the same as Ayako. The next seat was supposedly for Akagi, but it was eerily empty. Scared and frustrated, I just closed my eyes, taking short breaths, and swallowing the unmanly act dwelling in me. Slowly, moments torturing my mind, memories started to crawl in my thoughts. Second after second, a dizzy sensation whipped into me, and my closed eyes found the pain I have kept all these days.  
  
_We often lie down on the grass and gaze at the wide, endless sky studded with stars. We do it, anytime possible, but certainly not absent when the moon is full and hazy. However, this night she didn't come. The full moon glowed above me as I crossed my hands, supporting the weight of my head, silently contemplating her absence.  
  
The night was empty and silent without her, that boredom started to reach onto me. After a few minutes of staring into nowhere, I stood up, inhaled the fresh night air and went home. I knew she couldn't make it. Anger discreetly coursed through me, arousing my usual cold self, which is well known to the basketball team. She must have a reason. I convinced myself and was stunned to find myself standing right in front of our house, especially when my eyes darted at her. She was there. Waiting. Alone.  
  
The glow of the moon didn't conceal her serene and innocent face. Her long, hazel brown hair shone and her smile never left her face.  
  
Suddenly, my eyes went glacial, and I stared at her. "Why didn't you come? You said you would. You know I can't wait that long," I said in a low monotone, ice literally darting to her.  
  
The small girl giggled happily. "Gomen nasai, Rukawa-kun!" she said breathlessly, which is oblivous to me. Though she said it with unexplained happiness, her apology was sincere. Her big eyes twinkled in the dark. "How was the game?"  
  
I nodded discreetly and freely let a smile claim my face. Her face glowed when she saw it. "As usual, we won because of me."  
  
"Great Rukawa!" she kind of freaked out and the nearby houses opened their lights and poked their heads on the window. One old man threw a beer can on my head, shouting, "hey bastard! Give us some sleep! Don't ruin my night, asshole! K'so!" and then he slammed the window shut. From a distance, a silent "Teme kitsune!" was heard.  
  
The girl turned red and giggled nervously. "I'm sorry. Rukawa. Ummm. you must be great in the game, Rukawa. Rukawa.."_

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To be continued…


	2. The other half: nightmares

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Author's note: uh-hmmm. I don't know if I'm going to make this a RuHaru. I'm just in the process of thinking of it. But I think not. Take note: no yaoi/shonen-ai in this fic! I really made this chapter looong. Reviews of any sort are entirely welcome!

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Rukawa's POV

Italicized paragraphs = flashback

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Jekyll and Hyde

Chapter 2: The other half: Nightmares

"Rukawa," this time I turned at the person addressing me. I stared at her directly, keeping my face impassive. It was the curly-haired girl's turn to avoid my eyes now. "He's here now," she whispered.  
  
I followed the source of the sound, glimpsing at every painful look of the people around me. Finally I found him. It wasn't another basketball practice; he wasn't wearing the usual bright-colored shirt. Instead, he donned his blackest shirt with the gloomiest eyes, carrying the unusual black eyes bags below. He wasn't the guy I knew. The strength always found in him dispersed, ending up in his hands as he struggled to steady them. A thin, white candle he lighted was placed on the center of the table, then he settled himself beside Kogure, exchanging meaningful glances with the guy.  
  
The candles glowed, and my gaze was locked in it, like a firefly tempted by the flame. Trapped.  
  
_I opened my eyes gingerly, and when I did, something like a hundred pounces came into me, my head twisting, my eyes darting here and there aimlessly. I was in the verge of going unconscious again when I realized I was lying on the ground, feeling the rough texture made by the cemented road, not on the driver seat of the car I was driving earlier. My eyes bulged as I spotted the heap of black car and dislodged parts, the gas leaking, dropping on the ground drop by drop. A blinding light and a sudden force threw me out of my reclining position, and like a doll, I lay flat on the ground, my mind blackened._  
  
The light flickered due to the wind and died. Automatically, I stood up, snatched the lighter on the table and carefully lighted the single candle. My hands were distant and blurred, everything was obscured. I was dead tired, but it seemed to me that I can't close my eyes and sleep. I just have to overcome myself.  
  
A large hand weighed on my shoulder. Without looking, I knew it was captain Akagi. And without him talking, I knew he wanted to talk about something. Yet I can't penetrate in his thoughts.  
  
"I need to talk to you," I faced him, head tilted so I can have eye contact with Akagi. I nodded silently, following his giant steps towards the patio. He stopped just beside the flowerbed, his back facing me. Obviously, he was too uncomfortable having eye contact. Fear of being found weak enveloped him, yet his voice remained that of a true Gori.  
  
"Are you still going to play?"  
  
"Play what?" I stubbornly asked, longing for that word. I wanted to hear it. I desperately want to hear it once again.  
  
"Basketball," he said simply, but painfully. It was a stabbing word. So painful.  
  
I knew he will ask this question. Part of me was glad that I'm not the one who must arouse the topic, and the other part was glad he knew me. But I'm still confused.  
  
"I don't know," three words. Meaningless.  
  
_"Nyahahahahahaha!" Sakuragi howled with laughter as he scored a three- point shot. His hands were akimbo, showing off.  
  
Somewhere near the exits, a high-pitched "Nice shot Sakuragi" was heard. Sakuragi's ears became big and turned red as he saw Haruko cheering for him. "Ore wa Tensai!" he muttered to himself as he gave Miyagi a high- five.  
  
"Do'aho," I grumbled under my breath, dribbling the ball to our side of court. Kogure was guarding my every move, however, he's too slow to spot my pivoting heel. With my back towards him, I jumped then shoot. But Sakuragi was always there to intervene, the very short red hair shining like a basketball. He jumped so high and then slapped the ball on mid-air. Miyagi retrieved the ball, dribbling past me. It's possible sometimes, I thought to myself.  
  
"Dream on kitsune no baka!" Sakuragi ran past me in his full speed. Sighing, I ran after him, taking my position, sweat trickling from my face.  
  
Minutes later, the game subsided. As usual, Rukawa's team won, making Sakuragi fume again, for the Nth time. The team went to the showers, meanwhile, I practiced by myself.  
  
While shooting some baskets, a girl in a ponytail came out from the dark. I knew she was there; I can feel her eyes surveying me. I know she was trying to say, "the moon is luminous tonight."  
  
I stopped and signalled an 'OK' sign to her.  
  
"Oi baka kitsune, do you know the meaning of cleaning?" Sakuragi taunted, leaving as he arrived, giving me a different/weird expression.  
_  
  
  
"You have to," Akagi coaxed. I want to see his face. Is he sincere? Is he not? I thought he was going to say the cliché "for your loved-ones". But as I stood there in silence, he thought of tactics of convincing me, like basketball, but more of it.  
  
/- Why? -/ I thought  
  
"Do it for us. For everybody. It is the only way to make them - me - happy. You owe me, Rukawa," his voice cracked. I long hated situations like this.  
  
"I'll think about it," I monotonously replied, then left the patio silently, swallowing the lump in my throat. I am weak, I thought as I went in again the familiar room. /- I don't watch weak people, they just make me weaker -/ I sat down and buried my face in my hands.

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To be continued…


	3. Second half: Stained Glass

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Author's note: The usual disclaimers…This fic is not entirely RuHaru, actually I can just vomit while imagining them together. Well, I haven't disclosed the identity of this person yet! Yeah, I think there are hints of HanaRu in this fic, I'll just input it on the other chapter…sort of a surprise. ^__^ Please review! Thanks if you're reading this!

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Rukawa's POV

* /- -/ = means the person's thoughts

*Italicized paragraphs = flashback

**Jekyll and Hyde **

Chapter 3: Second Half: Stained Glass

Ayako stood, leaving the circle of chairs, went to Akagi, acting like the woman she has to be. She silently patted the big man's shoulder, soothing him with her voice.

I kept my hand on my face, feeling its warmth going in my head. A fiery sensation claimed me, but my body felt cold, trembling. Somehow, the grief that was built in me went out. I want to let it out, but I'm too afraid. I can hear Kogure whispering Mitsui and the light steps of Miyagi pacing back and forth. The others sported silence, unable to speak, trying to feel the ambience of sadness. Moments later, Akagi's footsteps was heard, followed by the silent ascent of Ayako.

And then I stared at nothing. I rubbed my temples to ease my throbbing head, the faint sound of a basketball went with the rhythm of the pounding, and I found myself recollecting the memories in my mind.

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The heat seemed to go down deep in me and I felt that every step was like progressing with a ten-ton metal on each foot. And I felt sleepy. 

With my eyes closed, I fumbled in my locker, not caring if all the contents fell out; I just want my sleep. I slowly pulled off my white uniform and donning a black sleeveless shirt with the usual white boxers. With a loud bang, I shut the locker close, proceeding to the gym. However, I felt something or someone on my way.

"Move," I opened my eyes halfway then closed it again. The heat was making me very sleepy. I think I dozed off for a few minutes before the person spoke at last.

"Oh! Gomen-nasai, Rukawa-kun! I think the heat made me absent minded…" It was her.

I ignored her, instead, I moved on, to the court. I shot a three-pointer and dozed off again. Basketball…Basketball…_I opened my eyes. Another three points. I didn't notice her praising my shots. She was there cheering for me, which isn't unusual, for the Rukawa fan's club, I irritatedly admit, is always there to distract._

"Rukawa, I've got to go! Ja mata ne!"

I shot below the ring, the ball circling the rim before falling in, with my silent goodbye for her. From a distance, I heard the loud chatterings of the team. I closed my eyes, blowing air from my mouth.

"Aho."

"Have you decided?" I fixed my stony stare at the speaker. A split second decision coursed thru my brain. Once I've said it, it's decided.

"Yes. Just a fulfillment of her wish," I nodded after that, adding the word 'atonement' in my mind. Akagi's face seemed to look good now; at least those eyes changed a bit. I hate to see a man dwelling over his griefs.

Minutes later, I contemplated the meaning of what I have said. Was it a turn around of my personality? Did I state unknown emotion that I did not feel? As I looked at Akagi, those blue eyes glinting in its depths, I sensed a feeling of triumph - or was it relief? 

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The curtain of galaxy enveloped my companion, who is inches away, and me. The full moon shone on her face, highlighting her pale face. A smile crossed her lips, as she turned her gaze at me. I remember that there was still that strange euphoria claiming her still face.

With her eyes boring into my emotionless face, I saw an unfamiliar glint in her eyes; the same glint I see every time she stares at me. Feeling a bit annoyed, I looked away from her, just staring at the sky. The clouds moved so slowly, after a few moments, it covered the moon. I turned to her.

Unbelievably, her eyes were still locked on me. Her face became crimson, then followed by a wide, dreamy smile; a blush telling that she was caught doing something off-guard. /-Aishiteru…Rukawa. Aishiteru-/

That glint again. Am I alien to emotions? I can't understand the meaning of her actions. Keeping my face indifferent, yet burning with curiosity inside, I asked,

"What?" when I intended to ask, 'Why?'

Disclose or conceal was the hardest decisions to make. She closed her eyes and placed her hands on the back of her head. She let a sigh escape her lips. "Nothing…"

I nodded.

There was something about the night, which drove me directly to my house. There was a hint of solitude coming into me. I entered the front door stealthily; afraid to make them notice my arrival. When I entered my messy room, the thought of dribbling a ball nudged me. Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two one_…I finally stood up, my bag slung on my shoulder, a basketball ready to dribble in my hand. The house can't contain me, and I'm not perfectly contained in it. My home was a few blocks away from here._

The basketball court.

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To be continued…

Thanks for reading once again! Please review! Hanamichi's entering the next chapter!


	4. A Vehement Soul

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Author's note: This is not RuHaru, for Christ's sake! Hanamichi finally appears on this chapter. This is a fic where Rukawa's inner feelings are portrayed, and Hanamichi's stupidity deleted. Haruko has NOTHING to do with Rukawa (and vice versa), for she is only a tool to show what the characters had to do with each other. (Sorry I did my term paper that's why I'm like this). And another thing, Rukawa doesn't have a bit of admiration towards Haruko, and it shows in this chapter. You will now know why he showed compassion in the earlier chapters. 

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Rukawa's POV 

Italicized paragraphs = flashback

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Jekyll and Hyde

Chapter 4: A Vehement Soul

The people I hate; the people I respect. 

Somehow they managed to get together in this dim and hot place. Haven't they noticed it? It's too hot and too dusky and it makes you think of stupid things. Fuck fate and its allies who brought all these to me.

Am I the one who should be blamed? 

I looked at Miyagi who was already sitting, his eyes dangerously going down to its extent. Kogure's head was cradled in his hands, and I have a slight suspicion that he was already dozing. Who could take this hellish place? Akagi - I doubt it. He's probably in the verge of committing suicide for all these torment. And I was in a desperate fit of getting a bit of sleep. 

The people who admired me...

I have nothing to say about them. Let's just say I'm not the Sakuragi kind who will favor a person who admires him. All I wanted is basketball… and basketball… and nothing else. 

I secretly glanced at Akagi's way and smirked in my mind. 

Who knows what I have been planning? Who knows I am like this? 

The pain I felt was…

The door opened suddenly, unveiling a big man with a wispy aura and a head nobody will forget. Fiery red hair filled with the known airiness, which sometimes is interpreted as negative and sharp brown eyes. 

Sakuragi Hanamichi… 

Though now he was visibly covered with the ardent urge of slaying. And his eyes were red as his hair; his cheeks were wet with tears. 

So he took it seriously. Good. 

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"Nice play, Rukawa!" Ayako exchanged high-fives with me after a rather tedious game with a team from the other district. The score elucidated it all: 78-50. I could spy from the corner of my eyes that they were crying, for they were the number three in Japan. 

Losers. If they were number three, we could easily beat the number one. 

And with my help, that is. 

I proceeded to the showers to freshen myself, but was stopped by a firm tan arm. I turned around and faced that do'aho who naturally exasperate me everytime he shows his face. 

Yet this face startled me. He hasn't got the usual sneer, but a serious look, which, in fact, intimidated the half of me. I opposed him with my icy façade.

"Nandato?"

"I have to talk to you. Now," he said, almost mandating. 

"Do'aho."

"I have no time for joking around," he said solidly. Since when did he idolize Akagi? Then, Sakuragi went to the grounds of the gym. I have no choice but to follow him. I stood behind his vast back, waiting impatiently. Suddenly he spoke.

"Uh…D-Do you have a relationship with her?" Sakuragi's voice split.

"No." Chikuso! Does he have any brains at ALL?

"I want you to be honest. You know, she means a lot to me. I-I…" Sakuragi's eyes blazed into mine. He at length had the guts to look into my imperturbable features. But he was such an idiot! Who could like an airhead?

"She's all yours. Period," with that, I left him staring on the ground, wearing that perplexed emotion. 

I don't give anything - even a damn for a person. 

Everything in life is just a play. 

The pain I felt was…

Probably now I can't admit it to myself as I faced the furious face of Sakuragi. 

Before I indulge myself to a heated fight, I drifted into a thought, which just passed, in my mind - like air. 

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"Kaede, I hope you'll take the responsibility of owning this car," my father uttered with a smile crossing his face. My mother was beside him, expressionless, uncaring. 

"I will," I glanced at my 'mother' with malevolence and fixed my expression in my frosty signature. 

My father enveloped his arm on the woman's shoulder and smiled radiantly. "This is a gift from your mother and I, for, of course, accepting our marriage openly. I'm proud of you, son." I didn't tell you anything… What do you think of me, an idiot? I gritted my teeth. My father threw the keys to me and left the room with his bitch. 

As I gazed at the keys on my lap, I figured out that their marriage might produce something useful for me - again. 

Halfway to the door, my father called to me and yelled, "They might move in here next week, son. Your mother, Haruko, and Takenori! Be prepared!"

Surely, I will prepare. I'll give them the worst they've ever experienced in their life. I promise it to the dead body of my true mother.

I promise.

And this pain…

This pain I felt wasn't for that airhead. I looked up, met the eyes of a do'aho. 

He was just an idiot. If he just knew the inner voice screaming messages to his head…

Then he'll just know…

…What exactly caused this tragedy.

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To be continued…

Oooo… I unconsciously turned this one into a yaoi fic. Review; tell me what you think. Thanks!

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